This framework of “parent, adult, child” is so useful. I work a ton in this space and I think this captures great categories of responses. We are so prone to get defensive to hide from the feelings that trigger inside of us that we can act so child-like. I think it’s useful to acknowledge how much this is a skill that we can cultivate. As you point out, Robert, even people with less “traditional” trauma in their lives can have these feelings. I used to suffer from the same mindset of “I don’t have any reason to be messed up — I had a great childhood!” So Step 1 became: stop judging and labeling these feelings as “messed up” — or what I call self-acceptance. Step 2 became: figure out the story in my head and where that comes from (which you gave great examples of in this article) — I call this self-awareness. And Step 3 is to make different choices in these situations to not allow my emotions to win — and to speak from the place of “adult” — or self-accountability. I hadn’t previously thought of that as the “adult” way to respond, but I definitely feel more “adult” when I’m able to respond in a calm, measured way, instead of letting my stories run rampant. I’d also like to say that these steps repeat for me — again and again and again. I actually wrote a guide about how to “Level Up” as a leader based on this 3 step process — it applies to all humans who want to deal with conflict more effectively. I cycle through this repeatedly so that I can behave like an adult more and more in my adult life. Thank you for this article, Robert!